10 Ways to Cope with Disastershock

If you are suffering from any of the symptoms of Disastershock described in the Introduction and located on your right, you may wish to try several of the ten stress reduction methods listed in this section. We recommend that you select two or three methods that appeal to you most, and practice them several times a day. For most of these methods to work, you must practice them each time you start to feel stressed.

Deep Breathing
Brief Muscle Relaxation
Monitoring Your Stressors and Your Stress Level
Thought-Stopping
Relabeling
Positive Self-Talk
Positive Imagery
Challenging Irrational Beliefs
Restoring Positives/Reducing Negatives
Developing a Sense of Mastery Through Action

Method 1 | Deep Breathing
This is the procedure of reducing tension in your body through practicing slow, deep breathing. This is a method you can use any time you feel tense or anxious. It is best practiced sitting or lying where you will not be disturbed. If you feel uncomfortable at any time, stop the exercise.

Let's try it! Take a slow, deep breath through your nose for two seconds: 1-2. Now hold your breath for two seconds: 1-2 and let it out slowly through your nose for two seconds: 1-2. Now repeat, breathe in for two seconds: 1-2, hold for two seconds: 1-2, breathe out for two seconds: 1-2. Now go to three seconds: Breathe in: 1-2-3. Hold: 1-2-3. Breathe out: 1-2-3. Now repeat: breathe in: 1-2-3. Hold: 1-2-3. Breathe out 1-2-3. Now continue deep breathing with a 3 second interval until it feels comfortable.

When you feel ready go to 4 seconds. Breathe in 1-2-3-4. Hold 1-2-3-4. Breathe out 1-2-3-4. Now repeat: Breathe in 1-2-3-4. Hold 1-2-3-4. Breathe out 1-2-3-4. That's excellent. When you feel ready, try 5 seconds. You should now be breathing slowly and deeply. If you wish, you may extend your breathing intervals to 6, 7, 8, 9 or 10 seconds. Remember to stop if you feel uncomfortable at any time. Practice this deep breathing for at least 5 minutes. You can use this method whenever you feel tense - when you are alone or in public.

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Method 2 | Brief Muscle Relaxation This stress-reduction method works by getting you to tense up all your major muscle groups at once for ten seconds, then suddenly relax them. Begin by practicing this when you are sitting alone. Do not practice this while driving.

Let's try it. Are you sitting comfortably? OK, here goes:

• Make a fist with each of your hands and squeeze your fingers together tight... tight... tight.... Place your fists against the outside of your thighs and push in so that you are squeezing your knees together. Push, push, push. • Squeeze your eyes shut tight and squeeze your lips together. Suck in your stomach and hold it, tight... tight....
• Now press your knees and legs together as hard as you can. Hold all your muscles tight for 5 more seconds 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 .
• Now relax. Let all your muscles go completely limp. Let yourself be like a rag doll. Notice the contrast in how your muscles feel. Notice the sense of warmth and calmness spreading through your body. • Now try it again. Make a fist with each of your hands and squeeze your fingers together tight... tight... tight...
• Place your fists against the outside of your thighs and push in so that you are squeezing your knees together. Push, push, push. Squeeze your eyes shut tight and squeeze your lips together. • Suck in your stomach and hold it, tight-tight....
• Now press your legs together as hard as you can. Hold all your muscles tight for 5 more seconds: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. • Now relax. Let all your muscles go completely limp. As you do so take a slow deep breath, hold it and let it out slowly. Think the word CALM to yourself. Let yourself be like a rag doll. Continue to breathe slowly and deeply as you notice the sense of warmth and calmness spreading through your body.

You may find it helpful combining this method with Method 1: Deep Breathing. You can use this method to relax when you are alone or in public (but not when you are driving).

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Method 3 | Monitoring Stressors and Your Stress Level This method involves accurately identifying the things that are causing you stress (we call these "stressors") and keeping track of the degree to which you are experiencing stress. If you don't know that you are feeling stressed, then you won't know when to practice your stress reduction methods. If you don't know exactly what is stressing you, you won't know where to direct your stress-reduction methods.

Let's start with stressors. Some common stressors caused by disasters are:

• Television or newspaper pictures of damaged buildings.
• Pictures of the dead and injured.
• Reading in a newspaper about how people died.
• Seeing homes on fire or being destroyed.
• Thinking the building you are in is not safe.
• Not knowing where other family members are.

These are only a few stressors that might be affecting you. A stressor may be something you see or something you just think about. Whatever it is, it triggers your stress. If you find yourself feeling tense or anxious, try to identify the stressor triggering your stress reaction. Did you just watch the news and see a picture of damaged property? Are you thinking about the victims? Once you know the source of your stress you can bring into action specific stress-reduction methods to lower your stress.

Next, identify how stressed you are. If you are not aware of any feelings, look at your behavior. Are you forgetting things, acting irritable, having trouble sleeping, can't sit still? These are signs of stress. Try to develop an awareness of your feelings: are you feeling numb, depressed, sad, afraid, helpless, angry, or guilty. Label your feelings. See if you can connect your feelings with a specific stressor (for example, an image of a damaged building). It helps you to understand your feelings when you identify the stressors that trigger your feelings.

Rate your tension level using a I to 10 scale. Make 10 the most tense you have ever felt, and I the most relaxed you have ever felt. What is your tension rating right now? Keep track of your stress levels by rating your tension level several times during the day. Notice the times when your tension level goes up, and use some of the other stress reduction methods to bring it down.

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Method 4 | Thought-stopping This is a method for shutting off unpleasant thoughts and images. You can use this approach when you keep having an unpleasant thought or image over and over. For example, if you keep thinking about a place where someone died and you can't seem to turn the thought off, then you might find this method helpful. Let's try it.

While you are thinking of your unpleasant thought or image, pinch yourself lightly on the arm and think the word STOP! Take a deep breath and, as you slowly let it out, think the word CALM and imagine yourself in the most peaceful scene you can think of (for example, lying on the beach, at the mountains or the lake, or relaxing in your backyard). For at least 20 seconds imagine your peaceful scene in as much detail as you can. Concentrate on imagining the scene of beauty about you. Let your body develop a sense of relaxation as you breathe slowly and deeply. (See Method 2: Deep Breathing.)

For this method to work, you must use it every time, repeat: every time you start to experience the unwanted thought or image. The method works by interrupting the unpleasant thoughts or images and by replacing them with positive images.

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Method 5 | Relabeling Relabeling is the method of using positive words or labels to describe something you have been labeling in a negative way. Instead of saying: "The glass is half-empty" you say "The glass is half-full". You look for the positives in a situation and emphasize them. This will help to reduce your stress. For example, if you see a picture of a damaged building, instead of using negative labels such as:
"This is awful."
"So many died there."
"This is horrible."

Search for positive labels: "There were so many courageous volunteers."
"Not that many died compared to what was first expected."
"Think of the many lives that were saved."
"The heroic rescues of many persons."

Similarly, when thinking about the disaster overall, use positive labels:
"Comparatively speaking there were few deaths."
"Most buildings were not damaged."
"We can learn from this disaster to build safer homes."

Whenever you find yourself using a negative label, search for a positive one. The principle is: Every cloud has a silver lining. Look for it until you find it!

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Method 6 | Positive Self-Talk This is the method of thinking Positive Coping Statements to yourself before, during, and after your encounter with a stressor.

Here's how it works. Let's suppose you know you are going to see something that really stresses you - for example, you have to drive to work and you get very stressed whenever you pass over a bridge that you fantasize will collapse.

To use Positive Self-Talk, make a list of some positive things you can think to yourself before you drive over the bridge, while you are actually on the bridge, and after you have passed over the bridge.

For example, as you approach the bridge you could think:
"There is the bridge, but I can handle it."
"Everything is going to be alright."
"I can manage my stress by breathing slowly and deeply."
"I've handled this successfully before."

While you are on the bridge you could think:
"I can handle it."
"I'll be over in a few seconds."
"Relax and breathe deeply."
"I can stay calm."
"Everything will be alright."

After you have passed over the bridge, you can think:
"Congratulations!"
"I did an excellent job."
"I managed my stress."
"I did my breathing well."

You will find it helpful if you prepare these Positive Coping Statements and then concentrate on thinking them in advance. Concentrate as you go through the 3 stages of encountering a stressor: before, during, after. This method works by interrupting the flow of negative images and thoughts that you might be having as you encounter your stressor. You can use Positive Self-Talk with any stressor you have to encounter directly (for example, passing a spot where someone died or passing a damaged building).

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Method 7 | Positive Imagery Positive imagery refers to imagining doing something that is very pleasant. This interrupts negative images and thoughts that stress you.

If you are feeling generally stressed, you may wish to fantasize having a mini-vacation. (Don't try this if you are driving.) Let's try it. Imagine you are on holiday in your favorite vacation spot. If you are at the beach, feel the warmth of the sun on your skin, sense the warmth of the sand beneath your beach towel, feel the breeze gently blowing across your body, listen to the waves gently splashing. Try to experience being there through all your senses. Continue this for about 5 minutes.

If you have to pass by a stressor directly (such as crossing a bridge or passing by a damaged building), try imagining yourself doing something pleasant that involves movement. Imagine yourself carrying a football and making for the goal line; see yourself jogging; imagine skiing on a field of snow and notice the snow spraying up over the tips of your skis as you make your turns. Don't use this technique if you are driving.

This method works by focusing your imagination on re-experiencing in detail some pleasant activity.

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Method 8 | Challenging Irrational Beliefs This is the method of writing down beliefs about the disaster that you think are irrational (but which you still believe) and then challenging these irrational beliefs by finding rational beliefs that contradict them.

Some common irrational beliefs you might have are:
"The highway bridge is going to drop on me."
"Another disaster will occur tomorrow."
"My house is going to collapse."
"I'm going to be killed."
"I am surrounded by nothing but horror."

These are all examples of irrational beliefs because they tend to catastrophize and overemphasize a negative point of view, and ignore positive information.

Give it a try. Identify any belief you might have about the disaster that you think is irrational or excessively negative. Write it down on a piece of paper under the heading: Irrational Beliefs. To the right write the heading Rational Beliefs. Under Rational Beliefs try to write out some more positive, rational beliefs about the situation.

For example, Instead of: "The bridge is going to collapse."

Write: "The chances of any bridge collapsing under me (or anyone) are very remote, there was only one bridge that collapsed in the disaster."

Instead of: "A huge flood (fire, earthquake, etc.) will occur tomorrow."

Write: "A huge flood (fire, earthquake, etc.) may just as likely not occur tomorrow. The last time a disaster like this occurred was 20 years ago."

Instead of: "I am surrounded by horrors."

Write: "It is true that many have died and much property has been damaged; it is also true that I am alive and there is much of life to appreciate; this is a very special community and I can be proud of how its citizens are courageous and loving in helping each other."

The heart of this method lies not in glossing over negatives, but in seeing the truth: that in reality there are positives even in the most tragic of circumstances.

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Method 9 | Restoring Positives/Reducing Negatives When we are caught up in dealing with a crisis, it is easy to forget to continue doing those pleasurable activities that naturally reduce our stress. For us these include: eating Chinese food, playing tennis, lying in a lawn chair in the sun in the backyard, playing with our dogs and cats, listening to music, watching football and baseball, and enjoying the company of family and good friends, to name a few.

You may find it helpful to identify relaxing activities you used to do before the disaster and then force yourself to start doing them once again. By re-engaging in these pleasant activities you will be interrupting the flow of negative images and thoughts caused by the disaster and you will be reminding yourself that disaster is only a very small part of life.

In addition to restoring positives to your life, you may find it helpful to reduce the negatives. If you feel stressed by pictures of disaster damage, don't look at them right now. Turn off the portion of the news that shows disaster damage. Don't look at unpleasant pictures in the newspaper. For the time being listen to some music rather than the news. Don't take in more negative images and information than you can handle. If there are unpleasant people in your life that you can avoid right now, avoid them. Identify negative persons and things that depress you and reduce your contact with them for the time being.

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Method 10 | Developing a Sense of Mastery Through Action An important source of stress caused by a disaster is the feeling of helplessness it produces in most of us. A disaster strikes without warning and we have no control. There are, however, some things you can do to reduce stress caused by feelings of helplessness. These are activities that you do to develop a sense of mastery or control over yourself and your environment with respect to dealing with disasters.

First, you can develop a Disaster Preparedness Kit for yourself and your family (if your disaster was one that knocked out electricity and other basic services). These contain materials such as water, food, a battery-operated radio, flashlight, first-aid kit, blankets, and a written plan describing how family members - if separated - will get in touch.

You might want to keep one of these kits in your house and also in your car. Being prepared in this fashion will reduce your sense of helplessness. You will know that if another disaster occurs, you have basic survival materials to protect your family and yourself.

Second, you can volunteer to help those affected by the disaster. You could give a homeless family temporary quarters if you have a spare room. You could give blood to the Red Cross. You could donate food, clothing, or money to a community agency helping survivors. Any of these volunteer activities will give you a sense of mastery over the disaster by giving you the sense that you are reducing its negative effects on others.

Third, you can become an expert on disasters and disaster survival by reading all you can on disasters. For example, for persons coping with earthquakes, one book we like is called Peace of Mind in Earthquake Country. Knowing about earthquakes if you live in an earthquake prone state can reduce your sense of helplessness. For example, during an earthquake should you stay inside a building or try and get out in the open? Where is the safest place to stay during a tornado? Finding the answers to questions like these will help you build a sense of mastery.

Finally, we recommend you become an expert in stress reduction as this will give you a sense of mastery over your feelings and tensions. Your local bookstore has many fine books on stress reduction such as:

-The Book of Stress Survival by Alix Kirsta
- Stress Management by Edward Charlesworth and Ronald Nathan
- The Doctor's Guide to Instant Stress Relief by Ronald Nathan, Thomas Staats and Paul Rosch
- The Stressless Home by Robert and Susan Bramson
- The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook by Martha Davis, Elizabeth Eshelman and Matthew McKay
- Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy by David Burns, to name a few.

We recommend that you try several of the above ten stress reduction methods, and try them more than once. If you find that these methods do not reduce your stress and that you are experiencing very high levels of stress, we strongly recommend that you seek counseling from a qualified mental health professional.